Return of the Musings

The Japanese national sport isn't sumo nor kendo, it's not baseball, or even ritual suicide it's janken or in American rock paper scissors. Children and adults alike are relentless in their pursuit of janken supremacy. Every time I teach an English lesson the game that goes along with the lesson involves janken in some way. On television there are janken tournaments complete with brackets, scorecards and even commentators. People honestly believe there is a strategy to janken because, "scissors takes longer to form" or "somebody that throws rock will move their hand faster." Almost every dispute in class is settled with a game of janken and children wanting to play janken will randomly accost me, even waiting outside of the bathroom.

Now I know why sick people in Japan wear masks. Nobody covers their mouths when they cough, ever. Japanese mind: "I cannot possibly dirty my hand or shirt sleeve with my cough so let me instead cough as hard as I can into the air." I can actually see the particles of sick wafting towards me. Gross. Solution? Cough into a mask instead. Brilliant!

It's nice to see so many active old people riding their bicycles everywhere. Obasans (old women) in there 80's still hop on a bike to do the daily shopping. The ojisans (old men) don't always look so healthy though. They are usually chain smoking while cycling and probably going to go drink the day away playing mahjong, Go, or pachinko with their retired buddies.

I know I've already covered the horror that is squat toilets but the urinals aren't that great either. Most of the time the urinal is too short for me, but hey no surprise there. Why I really don't like urinals is because Japanese guys tend to utilize the hug the wall technique of peeing where I, like most Americans, like to leave a little space between my stream and the bowl to prevent splash back. By now I'm used to being stared at, just not in the bathroom. Maybe because of my stream space or because I'm a foreigner but every damn time I use a urinal and some other guy is there he blatantly stares at me. I'm not talking about my eyes either. I was supposed to go to an onsen last week where everyone is butt naked but it was closed. I'm anticipating when I do go that I'll get stared at a lot. Again, I'm not talking about my eyes.

Why do teachers, and not just teachers but a large part of the Japanese work force, have to stay so long at work? I know teaching is not an easy job, but are the 12 hour days really necessary every day? Half the time it seems they are just browsing the Internet or drinking tea and chatting. Why the hell can't they just get their work done and go home to have dinner before 9:00pm?

Japanese people really really love their unique four seasons. You can only wear certain clothes during a certain season, do certain activities, and eat certain foods. Its summer let us go to summer festivals, watch fireworks and drink. Its fall let us moon gaze, watch the changing leaves, and drink. Its winter let us visit Hokkaido, give money to our adorable grandsons, and drink. Its spring let us go cherry blossom viewing, have picnics and drink. The Japanese also like to use any excuse to have a drinking party no matter what season it is.

Disney is popular in Japan, very popular. Students have as much Disney paraphernalia with them as the three most popular animes: Pokemon, Dragonball Z and Naruto combined. Lilo and Stitch may have bombed in the US but it is making fat BANK in Japan. A Disney movie combining Hawaii with adorable anime looking creature equals instant classic to the hearts of the Japanese.

In the podunk town I live in nobody travels very much but everybody and their obasan has been to Tokyo Disneyland. Not even knowing I've lived in California, just that I'm an American, one of the first questions people will ask is, "Have you been to Disneyland?" When I reply with a yes a look of wonder, amazement and jealousy all wrapped in one sweeps over their face. I'm bombarded with dozens of follow up questions asking me how great Disneyland is or how is it different from Tokyo Disneyland. Children (and adults) have been so persistent with their questions about Disneyland that for now on if anyone asks me if I've been to American Disneyland I'll simply say NO.